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Thursday, September 25, 2008
Death – the impetus for our third wedding?
   My husband, an estates lawyer, says one-hundred percent of all marriages end in death or divorce. (Cheerful statistic, isn't it?)
Since divorce was not an option, death became the impetus for our third wedding. Morbid? Not us!
My hubby’s family is buried at a small town’s Jewish cemetery. However, since I could not be buried beside my husband in this Orthodox Jewish resting place, I opted to tackle the issue with a simple solution - convert and become an Orthodox. Not surprisingly, this overnight decision took about a decade. As anyone can tell you, choosing a plan of action is easy. The tricky part rests in the execution. Undaunted, we adapted and embraced the new lifestyle changes.
A few pluses as a result: our children would likely avoid the fuss of becoming an unmarried married person; and they could participate in our third (and final!) visit under the Chupah, truly making it a family affair.
Below are a few notable aspects of an Orthodox wedding:
The bride (kallah) and groom (chasson) fast on their wedding day (until the reception). Standing under the Chupah, their joint destiny is set and all previous transgressions are erased. I really liked that part ... erasing all past indiscretions.
My dear husband placed the wedding band on my right forefinger during the ceremony. This stems from the ancient belief that the index finger was directly connected to the heart. Before this wedding, we had the jeweller’s markings removed because a ring without blemishes symbolizes a marriage that will be free from strife or conflict. So far so good! The bride’s acceptance of the ring is when the couple is considered married. Finally! LOL!
It’s a huge blessing (mitzvah) to make the bride and groom happy. We were fortunate to have many people make us smile on our special day, but the best one came from a friend who came to the reception wearing a plastic lei and a hula skirt over his suit. Just priceless.
Getting back to our children’s participation - our daughter was a beautiful flower girl, and our son assumed the role of ring bearer. Great, we’re all set. Daughter leads me in; my dashing chasson is waiting under Chupah... Yes, this time everything is perfect and so we begin.
Hang on, someone is missing! Has anyone seen a ring bearer about so high? A search party is dispatched.
Not to worry. We locate the missing party playing cards with a friend on the landing of the synagogue’s back stairwell. Obviously this was a more happening place than the sanctuary.
We begin again and this time, this third and final time became our charm.
Coming soon to this wonderful blog, tips on how to make friends by becoming official wedding crashers.
20 Comments:
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Now that's a great story!!!!! :-)
Shirley
- September 25, 2008 at 5:09 AM
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Thanks, Shirley! :) My son read it this morning and said, 'It's okay.' That's gushing praise from my 15 year old. LOL!
- September 25, 2008 at 5:59 AM
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LOL Gail! Yes that is praise coming from a teenage boy. Glad your third wedding was the charm... i love the part of the part of standing under the Chupah together in a joint destiny. Lovely.
Thanks for sharing your wedding story....um stories *g*...with us.
- September 25, 2008 at 8:06 AM
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It's been a great ride with Gail, hasn't it? I have such interesting friends...:-P
And the fun isn't over yet! Gail still has one more story to go...and I'm going to be giving away signed copies of The Bridegroom's Secret for any interesting stories.
Melissa
- September 25, 2008 at 8:12 AM
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Hi Eleni! Thanks for hanging out with me on this triple wedding header. :) I especially appreciate it as The Wedding Planners gave me my first blogging experience.
So, a big thank you to all the fabulous authors for this blog and their wonderful stories! Yay! :)
Eleni, since the blog is continuing, will you consider blogging about Greek weddings? :) Check out the post, 'Stay Tuned for More.' :)
Gail
- September 25, 2008 at 9:23 AM
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Lisa, thanks for having me here! It's been such fun going through albums and watching the wedding video. Oddly enough, we only have one video - from the first wedding. *g*
Also, thank you for offering a signed copy of The Bridegroom's Secret for Monday's installment. The person who gets that will be in for a treat!
Gail :)
- September 25, 2008 at 9:26 AM
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Three weddings! One guy! Interesting concept
- September 25, 2008 at 11:11 AM
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Thanks for stopping by, anonymous! As for concept, must be love, eh? :)
All the best,
Gail :)
- September 25, 2008 at 11:31 AM
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I married my husband in a private, civil ceremony at city hall and six months later was married by a Minister in front of family. So, I have enjoyed hearing the tale(s) of your Weddings! (And we're getting ready to do it again!) Thank you for sharing these lovely stories!
- September 25, 2008 at 1:15 PM
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Ah! That is such a nice story! I love learning the meanings behind all the tradition. Just beautiful.
- September 25, 2008 at 1:22 PM
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Hey, Brandy! :) Wow, congratulations!!! Notice that rated three exclamation marks. *g* Maybe you should be blogging. :) Just think - soon we can officially accept you into the 'Thrice Wed, Yes, That Should Cover It, You're Married!' Club! LOL!
I'm heading out to karate for the evening, but I have to ask - any wedding jitters third time around? :)
Congrats again!
Gail :)
- September 25, 2008 at 1:49 PM
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Hi Anonymous!
Thanks! That's what I like about this wonderful blog. They've brought us all kinds of wedding related stories.
WTG, Wedding Planners!
Gail :)
- September 25, 2008 at 1:53 PM
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But what will you do on your fiftith anniversary? Which wedding will you re-enact? Or do you figure you have renewed your vows as much as is humanly possible in one lifetime?
:-)
Continued blessings. This sure beats hearing about folks that have been divorced seven times!
Peace, Julie
- September 25, 2008 at 2:28 PM
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Best wedding story/ies. Ever. Loved reading these!
e-L
- September 25, 2008 at 6:13 PM
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Well Gail, since you so nicely requested here is my comment...."COMMENT". hehe. But seriously, I have know your wonderful family for what....@ least 5-6 years now & your partnership is something I admire, cherish & think is darm right fun. I appreciate not only my friendship with you, but to observe your friendship with each other. You better invite me to the next wedding....hopefully with the same guy...hahaha.
Luv ya.....Juan.
- September 25, 2008 at 6:41 PM
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Julie, it's funny you should ask. *g* We always celebrate our first wedding date and the day we first met. They're three days apart. :) We've had an ongoing 'discussion' ever since we first married. I tell my dear hubby he owes me at least sixty years. He likes to be contrary and say he'll only promise fifty. What nerve, eh? *g* Of course since I like to get the last word (Who? Me? *g*), I'll usually respond with, 'Fine! Sixty it is!' LOL! Hey, maybe for our fiftieth, we should go to Vegas and have an Elvis wedding. LOL!
I agree with you, Julie. Wedding stories trump divorce stories. :)
Keep smiling!
Gail :)
- September 25, 2008 at 7:10 PM
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Thanks, e-Lizabeth! :) If you find time, there are so many other great stories here. It's an amazing collection. :)
All the best,
Gail :)
- September 25, 2008 at 7:11 PM
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'Juan!' :)
Hey, sweetie, consider it done! If I get married again, you'll be at the top of the guest list. For you, I'll even marry the same guy. *g* Seriously, I couldn't imagine myself with anyone other than my dh. When you've got the best, you don't need the rest. :)
Big hugs and love right back at you!
Well, folks, it's bedtime for me. Thanks for dropping by! You made my day! :)
Gail :)
- September 25, 2008 at 7:15 PM
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No jitters! *G* We're doing this third ceremony for our marriage to be recognized in our Church. We've been married over 15 years now, so I'd hope there would be not jitters! LOL!
- September 26, 2008 at 1:26 PM
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Brandy, I'm glad to hear there are no jitters. :) BTW, that's a great reason to get married again! Plus, this time around you can just relax and enjoy the fun! Congrats again! :)
All the best,
Gail :)
- September 26, 2008 at 1:40 PM
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