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Friday, May 9, 2008

Moms Weigh In!

Moms Weigh In!

The Top Three Things Moms Wished Their Daughters
(and Sons) Would Remember About Their Big Day...

My friends and I are at the age when our children are getting married. Nearly every time we get together we're talking about somebody's upcoming wedding! The "motherly" observations about our children's weddings are typically varied, but we all seem to have in common three wishes for our children and their big days.

1. Spend realistically!

If you spend too much you could be dipping into the down payment on your first house and even setting yourself up for years of debt repayment.

Focused on making their big day special, brides and grooms frequently spend more than they have. Credit cards are so convenient couples can forget they have to pay that money back. Keep your spending in perspective. The real cost of your wedding could be the down-payment on your house, furniture, and/or ten years of credit card debt if you don’t spend realistically.

Here's a link for an "expert" opinion!


2. Things will go wrong!

Everybody plans for the perfect day, but Moms know nothing in life is perfect. Something...maybe even lots of things...will go wrong.

A bit of trouble won't spoil your big day as much as having an embarrassing meltdown. Especially since most meltdowns result from unrealistic expectations. Expect a few spills. Don't panic if someone is late. Give everybody involved in your wedding a little leeway!

Here's a link to help you get perspective!

Weddings and Chaos Theory

3. Your wedding isn't as important as your marriage.

Everybody wants a big, beautiful day to remember, your mom would rather see you happy in your marriage.

Here's a great article on how to make your marriage as wonderful as your wedding day!

Click Here to Read Article


Blogger Linda Goodnight said...

Excellent advise, Susan. I remember telling my daughter in law, who is a perfectionist with enormously high expectations, that something would invariably go wrong and to be prepared for that. Other than a slight meltdown when one of the bridesmaids had lost weight and the busom of her dress was falling off, my d-i-l did great. Things did go wrong, but she went with the flow.

Oh, and by the way, the mother of the bride is an excellent seamstress. Fifteen miniutes before the ceremony, she took the bridesmaid's dress, resowed the top by hand, and it looked great.

May 9, 2008 at 8:27 AM  
Blogger Brandy said...

Number 3 is the MOST IMPORTANT. Watching all those "Rich Bride, Poor Bride" and "Platinum Weddings" on tv has made hubs and I turn to each other and wonder if these people have ANY CLUE to what that kind of money could do for them down the road.

May 9, 2008 at 1:03 PM  
Anonymous navillusette said...

Those are such important pieces of advice. And they are all things my own mother told me, too. Words of wisdom, indeed.

May 9, 2008 at 8:37 PM  
Blogger Susan said...

Oh my gosh! Linda! I laughed when I read of your daughter-in-law's bridesmaid troubles! We all think losing weight before a wedding would be a good idea...until we think of the sliding bosom!


May 10, 2008 at 6:15 AM  
Blogger Susan said...

I came from the generation that seems to have started the "divorce" ball rolling.

At first I was saddened by the number of friends who had the "glamorous" weddings and disasterous marriages.

Then suddenly I began to see that in some instances (not all) the involved brides and grooms were paying more attention to the wedding than their choice of mate!


It's sort of like the one reality TV show where the "rich guy" (who turned out not to be so rich) married the nurse...who didn't really like him ... on national TV...Wish I could think of the name of that show...Anybody?

Anyway, the contestants were only concerned with "winning"...being chosen. The bachelor was the one with the options. But he didn't notice the woman he chose didn't really like him.

Nobody seemed to "get" the fact that they were entering into a sacred union. Sheesh!

One would have thought that would have ended TV dating shows...but nope. We seemed to like the disaster. LOL.

The contestant's name was Darma? Is that ringing a bell for anybody?


May 10, 2008 at 6:20 AM  
Blogger Susan said...

Good advice really does survive the test of time!

One of the things I tell my daughter ... as she navigates the dating world...is to look at how her dad treats me.

He likes me. LOL Actually, we like each other. We don't have a lot in common...I try to play golf but issue helmets to anyone golfing near me to avoid head injuries from wayward shots! And he will...grudgingly...watch a romantic comedy when we go to the movies every other time. But essentially we're very different.

But, we "like" each other as people. We respect each other. We will sacrifice a little time to participate in something the other likes.

That's really what it's all about. Liking each other enough to want to spend time doing something you might not like. And respect.


May 10, 2008 at 6:24 AM  
Blogger Melissa said...

Very good advice, Susan!

I know of friends who were more into the we're X years old and have been dating for Y years so it's time to get married rather than what marriage would actually mean in the long term. Needless to say, they are no longer married.

May 10, 2008 at 9:31 AM  

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